Subject: Daily Dose - 070521 - Precious, BIZARRE NEWS, old shotgun, DDL,
Rotten News
Precious
A naive young girl from a small town
was visiting friends in San Francisco. She phoned her mom to let her know how
she was getting along.
"Things are rather strange
here. I see men who hold hands, kiss and hug each other. They're called 'gays'
or homosexuals. Even more surprising, there are women here who do the same
things and they are referred to as 'lesbians'. You probably won't believe this,
but some men here put their heads down on a woman's private parts and do things
with their tongues."
"Good Lord," her mom said,
"what do they call them?"
"Well, after I caught my breath
I called one of them PRECIOUS!"
______________________________
BIZARRE NEWS...
Bizarre Random Fact
George Washington and Thomas
Jefferson both grew hemp. Ben Franklin owned a mill that made hemp paper. The
US Declaration of Independence was written on hemp paper.
On every continent there is a city
called Rome.
Eskimos use refrigerators to keep
food from freezing.
Neil Armstrong stepped on the moon
with his left foot first.
Lightning strikes men about seven
times more often than it does women.
Women make up 49% of the world
population.
About 50% of Americans live within
50 miles of their birthplace. This is called propinquity.
From the Middle Ages until the 18th
century the local barber's duties included dentistry, blood letting, minor
operations and bone-setting. The barber's striped red pole originates from when
patients would grip the pole during an operation.
The US nickname Uncle Sam was
derived from Uncle Sam Wilson, a meat inspector in Troy, New York.
The electric chair was invented by a
dentist.
***
Girl receives her dog's severed head
ST. PAUL, Minn. - Brace yourself
PETA members. Police in Minnesota were looking for the person who killed a
teenager's therapy dog and sent her the head, boxed and gift-wrapped.
"This was so cruel,"
Crystal Brown told the Minneapolis Star-Tribune. "This is one sick,
twisted person."
The Humane Society has offered a
$2,500 reward for information leading to the person who killed the dog. The
case is being handled by the police homicide squad because of the implied
threat in the action.
Brown's 4-year-old shepherd mix dog,
Chevy, vanished about a month ago. The head was left at her grandmother's house
in St. Paul two weeks later. Brown spent days looking for Chevy. She put up
fliers around her neighborhood and went by bus to the animal shelter in St.
Paul to see if the dog was there.
While Brown has a new dog, a puppy
she has named Diesel, she said she still misses Chevy.
***
Court guard on trial for
prostitution
FRANKLIN, N.H. - A former court
security officer in Franklin, N.H., is on trial for allegedly offering a local
couple $20 an hour to have sexual intercourse while he watched.
Prosecutors told the jury Robert
Theriault told the couple they would be testing bed sheets and condoms for
insurance research, the Concord (N.H.) Monitor reported Thursday. The couple
said they were skeptical of Theriault's claims but were convinced to
participate because of Theriault's employment with the court. They said they
needed the money for a court fine and asked Theriault to film them while he
watched because they wanted a tape of themselves.
The couple came forward after
hearing of other allegations against Theriault by a second couple. He is
scheduled for a separate trial for those allegations and jurors in the current
trial are not aware of the charges.
Theriault is charged with six counts
of prostitution.
***
Bizarre graveyard scene puzzles
police
YONKERS, N.Y. - Police in Yonkers,
N.Y., are investigating discoveries at an old cemetery that included an animal
heart filled with pins and toppled gravestones.
Investigators said a half-dozen
headstones were toppled and covered with candles by vandals and a number of
strange objects -- including the animal heart, a hollowed gourd and a picture
of a smiling man in a suit -- were found at the scene, the White Plains (N.Y.)
Journal News reported Thursday.
"Right now we are exploring all
possibilities in this admittedly strange matter," Police Commissioner
Edmund Hartnett told the newspaper. He said police are exploring whether the
vandalism may have been a prank or part of a ritual.
Cemetery caretaker Stanley Feciaszko
told the Journal News he discovered the scene while walking with his girlfriend
and his dog. He said his girlfriend encountered two men and a woman after he
left to phone police. He said the intruders screamed and fled when they saw
they weren't alone.
***
Stray cats on rampage send 3 to
hospital
NORTH PLATTE, Neb. - Police in North
Platte, Neb., are awaiting word on rabies tests on two rampaging stray cats
that injured three people.
Animal control officer John Pettit
told the North Platte Telegraph that he responded to a call for help and found
two women with numerous bites and scratches and the two cats closed up in a
bedroom. A boy also was attacked when he opened the bedroom door. All three
people went to a hospital for treatment.
The cats apparently had wandered in
through the open front door and attacked the people inside for no apparent
reason, officers told the Telegraph.
Pettit used tranquilizer darts to
capture the animals and took them to a shelter.
______________________________
Rummaging through her attic one day,
my friend Kathryn found an old shotgun. Unsure how to dispose of it, she called
her parents.
"Take it to the police
station," her mother suggested. My friend was about to hang up when her
mom added....
"And, Kathryn?"
"Yes, mom?"
"Call them first and let them
know you're coming."
______________________________
DDL
A stingy old lady in Weed
Collected each drop that she peed
To be stored in a rack
On the roof of her shack
Are visitors nervous? Indeed!
______________________________
"This is wonderful weather we
are having. It's a beautiful spring, everyone is in a great mood. As matter of
fact over at St. Patrick's I saw the priests loading their Super Soakers with
holy water."
--Dave Letterman
***
"Marriages don't last. When I
meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is: is this the man I want my
children to spend their weekends with?"
--Rita Rudner
***
"While getting dressed one
morning, I decided I have been spending waaaaay too much time on the computer,
when I caught myself checking the lower right corner of my makeup mirror to see
what time it was."
--Unknown
***
How come when you mix water and
flour together you get glue. And then you add eggs and sugar and you get cake?
Where did the glue go?
You know darned well where it went!
That's what makes the cake stick to your butt!
***
"Al Sharpton may seek DNA test
to prove he's not related to Strom Thurmond. They won't even have to dig up
Strom. They'll get a sample from his pillow case with the eye holes."
--Bob Mills
______________________________
Rotten News.... (true)
Turkish Airlines workers sacrifice
camel at airport
Wed Dec 13, 5:40 AM ET
ISTANBUL (Reuters) - Workers at
Turkish Airlines celebrated a job well done by sacrificing a camel at Istanbul
airport and their boss has now been suspended.
The national flag-carrier said on
Wednesday maintenance staff killed the camel at Turkey's busiest airport after
sending a batch of aircraft back to the supplier ahead of schedule.
Turkish newspapers carried pictures
of the camel, two rugs thrown over his hump, ahead of Tuesday's sacrifice. They
also showed pictures of the beast chopped up into chunks of meat.
Top-selling daily Hurriyet said 700
kilos of camel meat were distributed among the workers. Turkish Airlines was
accepted last week into the Lufthansa-led Star Alliance.
Many Turks slaughter animals,
usually sheep or cattle, in an annual Muslim festival called the Festival of
the Sacrifice, which falls in early January.
**********
Friday, 19 January 2007, 12:13
GMT
Marathon runner jailed for
fraud
A man who ran several marathons while claiming disability benefits has been
given a 10-month prison sentence.
Paul Appleby, 47, from Mansfield,
Nottinghamshire, started claiming benefits in 1994 - saying he needed a
wheelchair or walking frame to walk.
But Appleby, who claimed £22,300 in
total, joined a running club in 2001, competing in road races and marathons.
Appleby admitted the fraud in
December and was sentenced at Nottingham Crown Court on Friday.
The 47-year-old former miner said he
had been forced to retire from work after suffering with back problems and was
genuinely disabled. But the court heard he joined the Sutton-in-Ashfield
Harriers running club in 2001 to try to lose weight put on after his
retirement, and was still claiming full disability benefit.
The prosecution said that after the
Department for Work and Pensions questioned him over the benefit claims in
2006, Appleby admitted a "massive change in his circumstances" and
said he did not deserve to receive benefits.
Between December 2001 and January
2006, Appleby claimed a total of £22,300 in overpayments.
**********
Court orders drug user to memorize
Koran
Wed Jan 24, 10:12 AM ET
RIYADH (Reuters) - A Saudi court has
ordered a drug user to spend six months memorizing the Koran, but he faces a
year in prison if he fails to recite the Muslim holy book by heart, a newspaper
said Tuesday.
The "alternative sentence"
saves the Saudi man from Jeddah from a six-month jail term, al-Watan said. But
that sentence will be doubled if his Koranic recitation classes fail to make
him a "hafez," someone who knows the Koran by heart.
There are more than 77,000 words in
the Koran. It takes on average two years to study.
Saudi Arabia's religious courts
apply strict Islamic sharia law. But it is largely uncodified and judges have
wide discretion when it comes to sentencing
*********
Granny grows horn
A Chinese grandmother has a five
inch horn growing out of her forehead.
The horn curves downward and looks
like the stalk of a pumpkin, reports the Yangcheng Evening Post.
Granny Zhao, 95, of Zhanjiang city,
Guangdong province, says it first appeared three years ago.
"At first, it was only a mole,
but it gradually grew and became like a horn," she said.
Zhao says the horn causes her little
trouble except to affect her vision slightly: "It causes me no discomfort,
but blocks part of my view."
But her family are hoping that
medical experts can explain the phenomenon.