Daily Dose - 020401 - Dangers of an Education, Rotten News, new gas station, DDL, Hey Martha
Dangers of an Education
A kid comes home from college. His father is a farmer, and he's shoveling all the manure out of the outhouse onto the hay crop to fertilize it. The kid says, "Hey, Pop - I learned in college that there is an easier way to do everything."
They go into town and get some dynamite. They're gonna rig it up under the outhouse and blow the manure into the hay field. They get it all rigged up, but they don't see Grandma coming to use the outhouse. Ba-Booom!
The manure goes flying, and so does Grandma. Ploop! She lands in the hay field. They go running up to her. "Grandma, Grandma! My God, are you alright? Are you alright?"
She says, "Yeah, I'm fine. Phew! I'm certainly glad I didn't let that one go in the kitchen!"
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Rotten News... (true !!)
Man Lives 2 Days Stuck In Windshield
Hit-And-Run Victim Eventually Dies In Driver's Garage
FORT WORTH, Texas -- A man who was the victim of a hit-and-run lived at least two days trapped in the driver's broken windshield before dying in the driver's garage in Fort Worth, Texas, police said.
"I'm going to have to come up with a new word. Indifferent isn't enough. Cruel isn't enough to say. Heartless? Inhumane? Maybe we've just redefined inhumanity here," a prosecutor in Fort Worth told Fort Worth Star-Telegram about the October 2001 incident.
Police arrested a 25-year-old woman Wednesday -- a nurse's aide -- on murder charges in the man's hit-and-run death, according to the Telegram.
Police told the Telegram that Gregory Biggs spent at least two days trapped in the broken windshield of the car that hit him. They said the woman who was driving the car, Chante Mallard, drove it home and kept it in the garage -- and heard Biggs begging for help before he finally died of blood loss and shock.
According to a police statement, Mallard panicked, and with the man still lodged in the windshield, she drove a few miles to her home, parked in her garage, and ignored his pleas for help until he died. His body was later dumped in a park.
The mother of the homeless man, Meredith Biggs, said she wonders how the woman could have let him die the way he did.
Police said Mallard told them she had been drinking and was on drugs at the time she struck the man, and that she panicked.
But Meredith Biggs told the newspaper that she wants to know why the woman didn't call for help after the drugs wore off.
Mallard told police she occasionally went into the garage, apologizing to the victim. The impact had hurled him headfirst through the windshield, his broken legs sticking out onto the hood.
Mallard's attorney said police are overreaching in charging her with murder.
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Sex staff tackle hazards
From AAP
21jan02
A NEW work safety guide has been launched for the sex industry, highlighting the dangers of dim lighting, tripping in showers and repetitive movement injuries.
The issue of sexually transmitted diseases was once the number one occupational hazard for a sex worker.
But it is other safety concerns that have resulted in a new publication from NSW's peak workplace safety watchdog.
WorkCover NSW today launched the sex industry's guide to Getting on Top of Health and Safety.
The guidelines, believed to be a world first, give brothel owners and sex workers the low-down on a safe working environment within their business.
The guidelines cover potential hazards to be checked in a brothel such as loose bed frames, storage of condoms, upkeep and cleaning of sex aids and checking cleanliness of spas.
It also warns of concerns about back injury from unsuitable beds and wrist injury from constant massage.
WorkCover NSW general manager Kate McKenzie said the guidelines were for brothels, massage parlours, escort agencies and various other sex venues.
"It's an industry just like any other and it's very timely I think that some effort goes into improving occupational health and safety standards in the industry," Ms McKenzie said.
She said sex industry employers had to ensure the health and safety of workers and clients.
But she said WorkCover NSW had not implemented the guidelines as part of a crackdown on the sex industry.
"This is aimed at prevention and education in the sex industry," she said.
"The idea is to make sure people in the industry have the resources to do the right thing."
Sex Workers Outreach Project manager Maria MacMahon, who helped develop the guidelines, said the sex industry had a low level of compliance on workplace injuries.
"Our knowledge of the industry indicates that a whole range of injuries can occur in the workplace, from slipping on a wet floor in bathroom settings - because most brothels have an ensuite or bathroom attached to working rooms - to things like tripping on stairs, slip hazards, a whole range of issues," she said.
Ms MacMahon said the industry historically had focused job hazards around sexual health and safer sex practices, but there were other areas that needed improvement.
"We need to look at the broader range of issues around occupational health and safety which can include looking at furniture, arrangements within rooms, lighting - all of those sorts of things," she said.
The booklets are available in Thai, Korean, Chinese and English.
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Driving into a new gas station, I eased up to a pump. It was diesel fuel. I circled and approached another set of pumps. Self-service, and I wanted full service. I circled to the remaining set of pumps, pulling up on the wrong side. One more time around, and I came from the right direction.
The attendant walked up to my car. "Lady," he said grinning, "I thought I was gonna have to get out my rope and lasso you in!"
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DDL
As the lift made its way from our floor,
Big Sue caught her boobs in the door;
She yelled a great deal,
But had they been real,
She'd have hollered considerably more.
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Prince Charles had injured an eye and is wearing an eye-patch. Sky News (satellite TV) tonight apparently called him "Your Royal Eyeless."
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"And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years."
-Abraham Lincoln
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Future, n. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness assured.
[Taken from Ambrose Bierce's "Devil's Dictionary."]
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Hey Martha (true)
Friday, January 04, 2002
Diary entry detailing car theft is woman's undoing
STRATFORD, Ont. (CP) -- A woman has learned that recording your crimes in a diary isn't a good idea.
The 37-year-old's entry into her diary detailing plans to steal a vehicle backfired when police who came to her apartment saw the open book.
"Guess I'll get ready to see what kind of car I can grab today," police quoted the entry as saying. "Hopefully one with lots of gas and extra cash for gas."
While investigating a report of a vehicle break-in on Monday, police followed fresh footprints in the snow to the woman's apartment, said Insp. John Hagarty.
The woman answered the door in her pyjamas and asked the officers if she could have time to get dressed, said Hagarty.
While the officers waited for the woman to change, they noticed an open diary on the kitchen table.
In an entry written shortly before the officers arrived, the woman stated: "Well so much for that idea. I got caught getting out of a woman's truck, she freaked."
The woman was arrested and the diary was confiscated as evidence.
Police have not released her name or the specific charges she faces.