Daily Dose - 010403 - home-stilled whiskey, BIZARRE NEWS, turtle is dead, active sex life, DDL, Hey Martha

Amanpreet was arrested for selling home-stilled whiskey. His lawyer put him on the stand and asked the jurors to look carefully at his client.

"Now, Ladies and Gentleman of the jury," concluded the lawyer, "you've looked carefully at the defendant.

Can you sit there in the jury and honestly believe that if my client had a quart of whiskey he would sell it?"

He was acquitted.

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BIZARRE NEWS.....

Bizarre Premonitions

After having nightmares for ten consecutive nights about a DC-10 crash, Cincinnati office manager David Booth called American Airlines on May 22, 1979. Three days later, 273 people died when an American DC-10 crashed at Chicago.

In 1896, German psychic Madame de Ferriem had a vision of bodies being carried out of a coal mine at Dux in Bohmeia in bitterly cold weather. A year later hundreds were killed by an explosion in a coal mine in Dux during a cold spell.

"Fugitive" star David Jensen had a dream in 1980 where he saw himself being carried out in a coffin after a heart attack. His psychic's advise to go in for a physical came too late, for two days later Jensen died of a massive heart attack.

On the morning of April 14, 1965, Julia Grant, wife of US General Ulysses S. Grant had a strong feeling that she and her husband should get out of Washington. As they were leaving, the couple passed John Wilkes Booth on his way to assassinate President Lincoln at the theatre. Grant was also found to be on Booth's death list.

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Man's Penis Was Spellbound By Witch's Presence

LAGOS, Nigeria - A witch "spelled" big trouble for a man when she allegedly stole his penis.

It is widely believed in Nigeria that witches have the power to steal men's sexual organs by an incantation or a handshake.

The woman had been stripped and beaten by a mob before being dragged down a busy road half-naked, although witnesses admitted to police that they did not see the actual theft take place.

They reported that they just took the man's word as he "held tightly on to his trousers."

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Floridian French Fried for Fleeing

PORT ST JOHN, Florida - A Florida man was in for quite a shock after climbing a power plant transformers to avoid being caught by police.

The 35-year-old man was being pursued by police officers in Port St John, Florida, after a domestic dispute with his estranged wife. He slashed all four tires on their car, ripped off the windshield wipers and fled before the police arrived.

To avoid being caught, the man climbed over a barbed wire fence surrounding a Florida Power and Light power plant.

According to Deputy Bruce Dowdy, "There was a loud boom and a puff of smoke," said Deputy Bruce Dowdy. "We observed him coming out of the power structure on fire."

About two-third of homeowners in the outlying area lost power for about 30 minutes following the incident.

The man, who remained conscious, burned most of his upper body and head.

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Man Gets Gassed Up During Affair With Neighbor

TIMISORA, Romania - While engaged in the heat of passion, a 41-year-old man suffocated to death from car exhaust fumes in his own garage.

Vasile Cotovanu started the engine of his car to keep warm while having sex to 35-year-old neighbor Viorica Muresan.

Obviously engrossed in what they were doing, neither noticed that they were suffocating.

The pair was found by the man's son who called an ambulance.

Muresan remains in a coma in a nearby hospital.

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Peeved Primates Punish Wrongful Motorist

SAUDI ARABI - A group of baboons hell bent on revenge waited at the side of a mountain road for the driver that had killed one of their own.

The primates laid in wait and ambushed the driver on the same mountain road in southwest Saudi Arabia where the baboon had been run down earlier in the week.

After spotting the car responsible for the death, one of the apes screamed out a signal to the rest to attack, provoking the frenzied stone throwing.

Although the driver was able to escape, the apes reportedly broke the windshield of his car.

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Ohio Students Are Drawn To Drew

OHIO - Drew Barrymore won over America's heart in E.T. and recently packed a powerful punch in Charlie's Angels.

Now, students at Oberlin College will be allowed to receive one credit toward their final degree if they choose to study the life and times of the young actress.

The course has been organized by the Experimental College, a student-run department which has previously given students the chance to study the Art and Science of Home Brewing and Whiskey Appreciation.

The final exam for the Barrymore course involves students performing a satirical sketch based on a scene from one of Drew's films.

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Dr. Zhivago Has Got Nothing On The Ice Hotel

STOCKHOLM, Sweden - One thing you will never lack in this hotel is plenty of ice. That's because Sweden's annual all-ice hotel is growing in size to accommodate increasing demand, with about 10,000 guests already booked for its chilly rooms.

That's right, an all-ice hotel. Apparently the tradition began 11 years ago when the owner of the village inn started making ice and snow displays to attract tourists to the little town of Jukkasjaervi, just outside of Stockholm.

When tourists started sleeping in the igloos for the novelty of it the idea was born.

The current structure has 45 rooms and 15 suites. But don't think you'll be roughing it at this five cube hotel. Guests also get a breakfast buffet, a shower and a sauna in facilities about 100 yards from the building.

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"Mommy, my turtle is dead," the little boy, sorrowfully told his mother, holding the turtle out to her in his hand.

The mother kissed him on the head, then said," That's all right. We'll wrap him in tissue paper, put him in a little box, then have a nice burial ceremony in the back yard. After that, we'll go out for an ice cream soda, and then get you a new pet. I don't want you . . ." Her voice trailed off as she noticed the turtle move. "Son, your turtle is not dead after all."

"Oh," the disappointed boy, wanting ice cream and a new pet, "Let's kill it!"

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A man told his sex therapist about his extremely active sex life.

He said that he had a wife, several mistresses, masturbated several times per day, and that he had wet dreams all the time.

The sex therapist asked which one he liked best.

He Replied, "Wet Dreams!!! Because you always meet a much higher class of people in them."

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DDL

What's reddish and roundish and hairy,
And hangs from a bush light and airy;
Often hidden away
From the broad light of day,
Beneath a stiff prick - A gooseberry.

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A red sign on the door of a physics professor: 'If this sign is blue, you're going too fast.'

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When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped, it always lands with the buttered side facing down. I propose to strap buttered toast to the back of a cat. The two will hover, spinning inches above the ground. With a giant buttered cat array, a high-speed monorail could easily link New York with Chicago.

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If the Earth is the size of a pea in New York, then the Sun is a beachball 50m away, Pluto is 4km away, and the next nearest star is in Tokyo. Now shrink Pluto's orbit into a coffee cup, then our Milky Way Galaxy fills North America.

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Hey Martha (true)

Friday, February 9, 2001

Mistrial declared in spray string case

SAN FRANCISCO (AP) -- Jurors deliberated for three hours but couldn't reach a verdict on assault charges against a student who sprayed his principal with blue and green spray string during graduation.

The judge declared a mistrial Thursday after the jury hung 6-6 on whether Steven Babb should serve up to six months in prison for spraying former Vintage High School dean Andrew Herron.

Babb, now 19, said he was simply reveling in the post-commencement atmosphere. He said he later apologized to Herron "for any embarrassment or injury but not for the act itself."

Prosecutors described it as a sustained, point-blank attack.

"(Babb) directed the stream of one can up his nose and another at his eyes," Prosecutor Gary Lieberstein said.

Lieberstein said he believed Babb's conduct was immature but said his office would drop the case. "There are certainly more serious cases than this," he said.