Tired of being a golf widow, a woman took up the game and wound up playing with her husband on a country course one day. He hit his drive way off into the rough, behind a barn. She came over to take a look, surveyed the situation, and suggested that if he opened both barn doors he could hit his ball straight through the barn to the green.

He saw this as an excellent idea, complimented her for her suggestion, then opened the doors and stepped up to the ball. He made a swing and great contact. Unfortunately, the ball was off line, careened off the door frame, hit the wife in the head and killed her.

Years went by, the man finally remarried, and this time found himself a golfer for a wife. Incredibly, the same situation occurs. The man is in the rough behind the same barn. His new wife took a look at his ball and suggested that he could make the green if he opened both barn doors and hit through the barn.

"No way," he says. "I can't do that."

"Why not?" she asks.

"The last time I did that something terrible happened."

"What?" she asked.

"I got a double bogey."

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The gynecologist thought it would be a good idea to expand his skills in the field of car maintenance and enrolled for a course to be trained as a mechanic. After completing the course, everyone had to take a practical exam.

When the exam results were posted, the other students were very upset to see that the gynecologist had scored 150% on the practical exam.

The examiner was called in to explain the outrageous mark.

"Well sir, I did not know what else I could have given him. This is the first time I have ever seen anyone do a complete engine overhaul through the exhaust."

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A man, who was an average golfer, was on the 11th tee at Augusta. He promptly shanks a shot into the trees. Upon discovering his ball, he found it to be next to a witch.

The witch was stirring a pot of golfer's brew. The gentleman asked the witch what the brew was for. The witch responded that the brew would do two things; first he would become the best golfer in the world and secondly his sex life would go to hell. And like most golfers I know, he choose the brew and better golf.

A year goes by and the man has won every major championship and is world renowned for his golf game. But, upon arriving at the 11th tee at Augusta, he hits a shot in the same woods where he reunits with the witch.

The witch remembers him and asks, "How's your golf game?" He responds, "Fantastic!" Then she says, "How's your sex life?" He responds, "Not bad..."

The witch says "Not Bad? What do you mean not bad??" The man says "Twice last year." The witch says "Most people think twice in a year is terrible."

The man answers "Well it's not bad for a priest in a small parrish."