A guy gets a job working in Alaska at a remote oil pumping station. When he gets there he notices that there are no women for hundreds of miles. As soon as he got the opportunity he asked his supervisor what they did for women. "Well," replied the supervisor. "We really have no access to women. If you feel the urge there is a barrel with a hold in it behind the building. You can use the hole."

A few days later the guy is feeling horny and decides to give the hole in the barrel a try. It is the best sex he has ever had. The following day he is talking with his supervisor and tells him that the hole in the barrel was great. "It's so good I'm going to use it every day," he exclaimed.

"Every day but Thursday," replied the supervisor.

"What's wrong with Thursday?"

"Thursday is your day in the barrel."

An inquisitive young man was on a flight to Hawaii and having a few drinks to celebrate he upcoming vacation. He became alarmed when he found that the men's bathroom was out-of-order. He asked the flight attendant for admittance to the ladies' room. "Certainly," said the attendant, "as long as you don't touch the WW button, the PP button, or the ATR button." Of course the young man agreed.

No sooner had he relieved himself when curiosity got the better of him and he pressed the WW button. He enjoyed the sensation of warm water being sprayed up onto his ass. This first experiment was so pleasant that he had no hesitation in reaching for the PP button, and was rewarded by the soft pat of powder puff on his ass. It felt so good that he pressed the ATR button.

The next thing he knew he was waking up in a bright, white room with a nurse standing over his bedside. "What happened?" he asked groggily.

"You pushed the WW button, right?" said the nurse, with a knowing look in her eye.

"Yes," he replied.

"You also pushed the PP button, am I right?"

"Yes, again," he responded.

"And then you pushed the ATR button, am I correct?"

"Yeah, so?"

"ATR stands for Automatic Tampon Removal. By the way, your penis is in a jar on the cabinet."

After having their 10th child, an Arkansas couple decided that that was enough. So the husband went to his doctor and told him that he and his wife didn't want to have any more children. The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem. The doctor told the man that he was to go home, get a cherry bomb, put it in a can, then hold the can up to his ear and count to 10. The Arky said to the doctor, "I may not be the smartest man, but I don't see how putting a cherry bomb in a can next to my ear is going to help me."

So the couple drove to Missouri to get a second opinion. The doctor was just about to tell them about the procedure for a vasectomy when he noticed they were from Arkansas. This doctor also told the man to go home and get a cherry bomb, place it in a tin can, hold it next to his ear and count to 10. Figuring that both doctors couldn't be wrong, the man went home, lit a cherry bomb and put it in a can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count. "1, 2, 3, 4, 5...", at which point he paused, placed the can between his legs and resumed counting on his other hand.