An old man of ninety was sitting on a park bench crying. A policeman noticed this and asked him why he was
crying.

"Well," says the old fellow, "I just got married to a twenty-five year old woman. Every morning she makes me a
wonderful breakfast and then we make love. In the afternoon she makes me a wonderful lunch and then we
make love. At dinner time she makes me a wonderful supper and then we make love."

The policeman looks at the old man and says, "You shouldn't be crying! You should be the happiest man in the
world!"

So the old man says, "I know! I'm crying because I don't remember where I live!"

Mr & Mrs Smith get to go on the "MR & MRS SHOW" (You know, the one where married couples are asked intimate questions about each other and they have to be able to match the answers). Well, Mrs Smith elected to go into the soundproof booth first. The host asked Mr Smith a couple of questions to which he replied before asking him, "Where was the strangest place that you and your wife have ever made love?". Mr Smith thought about this, then replied, "Outside the local Superstore where we do our shopping, in their Car Park."

The assistant gets Mrs Smith out of the soundproof booth and brings her over to the host. He asks her the first couple of questions to which Mrs Smith gives the correct matching responses. He then says "We asked your husband where was the strangest place that you and he have ever made love?" Mrs Smith blushed and said "I can't answer that it's too embarassing!" "No. It's OK", said her husband, "I've already told them!" "Oh well, in that case - Up the bum!"