----------------------------- MOOSE --------------------------------

When I was a young man I used to like girls.
I'd fondle their body, I'd play with their curls.
Til my wife ran away with a salesman named Bruce.
Now you'll never be treated that way by a moose.

Moose. Moose. I like a Moose.
I've never had anything quite like a moose.
I've had many women my life has been loose.
But I've never had anything quite like a moose.

Gorrilas are fine on a Saturday night.
Lions and tigers they put up a fight.
But it 's just not the same when you shag their caboose,
as they feeling you get when you're ramming a moose!

I've done it with all kinds of beasties with hair.
I'd do it with snakes if their fangs were not there.
I've done with cats, dogs, gazelles and a goose.
But there's no way in hell that I'll give up my moose.

The people's of old they had their icons.
The Greeks, the Romans, and Amazons.
But get away God, Allah, Buddha, and Zeus.
I'll only go down on my knees for a moose!

When I'm in the need of a very good lay,
I go to the stable and find me some hay.
I open the window and spread it around.
'Cause moose always come when there's hay to be found!

When I am an old man, advanced in my years.
I'll look back on my life and shed me no tears.
I'll sit in my rocker with a glass of Mateuise.
Playing hide the Salami with Marvin the Moose