This guy, Mohammed, is entering college, so he has to talk to his councelor about some
things. The counselor is telling him that he must take 5 hours of English, 5 hours of
Math, and that he also gets to take 2 hours of an elective. John asks, "what
electives do you offer?" The councelor says, "Well, we have an opening in our
deductive reasoning class." John then asked what deductive reasoning was, and the
councelor replies, "For example, do you have a dog?"

"Yes."

"From that I can deduce that you live in a fenced in yard."

"yes."

"From that I can draw that you're married."

"Yes."

"From that I can draw that you're a heterosexual."

"Oh, hell ya," says John, "Deductive Reasoning sounds good."

So John walks out of the councelor's office where he sees his friend Bruno. Bruno
says, "Hey John, what classes are you in?"

"Hey, I got into this cool deductive reasoning class," replied John.

"What's deductive reasoning?" asked Bruno.

"For example, do you have a dog?"

"No."

"Get out of here Faggot.......!"

A Museum curator was looking for an artist to draw a mural of
Custer's Last Stand. When he finally found an artist who had knowleged
of the historical period he gave him explicit instructions to draw the
picture capturing what was goiing through Custer's mind at the time.
The artist assured the curator that he understood. He began the mural
with a hugh pond that had a fish jumping out of it with a halo over its
head. All around the pond there were Indians having sex. The curator
returned in shock - he yelled at the artist telling him he did'nt have a clue.
The artist said that he did and told the curator that he had captured the
exact thoughts that Custer had, see here the artist said Custer was thinking

"Holy Mackerel, look at all these fucking Indians!"

My girlfriend was in the bathroom the other day rubbing cotton balls all over her
boobs. So I looked at her and asked,

-"what the hell are you doin' that for?"

She replied, -"well, I read in a magazine that if you rub cotton balls all over your
breasts it makes them bigger."

So I said, -"well, why don't you try toilet paper, It worked on your ass!"